The Advantages of Being a Woman
by HeartForSoul
Summary: As the girls are sitting in the Glee room, talking about the wonder that is Madonna, the boys overhear, wondering what it's all about. The girls then decide to show their boyfriends that there are many advantages to being a woman.


**AN: Okay, I was bored and I found a list so I decided to write a long one-shot with my favorite TV show! This was fun to write! Oh, and I don't mean to be rude to guys, that's just how it works in this fic!**

**Here are the pairings!**

**Rachel/Puck**

**Finn/Quinn**

**Jesse/Santana**

**Mike/Brittany**

**Artie/Tina**

**Matt/Mercedes**

**Blaine/Kurt**

**I hope you like this! :)**

**HeartForSoul**

**Disclaimer: If I owned Glee, then I would be a character that Mark Salling made out with in every scene. :)**

* * *

"Madonna was so confident," Rachel smiled, dreamily thinking about what it would be like to do a Broadway production of Madonna's life. The glee club had decided to do one of Madonna's numbers for sectionals this year and the girls were all excited, sitting in a close circle and talking.

"It's true," Tina smiled. "But so are we!"

"Yeah, I am a proud woman," Mercedes nodded.

Santana grinned. "She also proves that women are a lot better than men."

"Oh yeah," Quinn agreed. "It's pointless to deny it."

Kurt smiled. "I suppose I'm allowed to be in this group still?" He asked. The others nodded, confirming his womanhood.

"There are so many advantages of being a woman," Brittany grinned.

The rest of the girls were silent for a moment. Whether it was because Brittany knew what 'advantages' meant or the fact that Madonna was running through their heads, no one knew.

At this point, Puck decided it was best to cut into the conversation. "Hey ladies, I hope you know that your boyfriends are all kind of waiting to take you home!"

Rachel looked up. "There you go!" She gestured to Puck, looking at the rest of the girls. "A woman would know to not stop such a serious conversation. She would either join in or keep silent."

All of the girls had wide eyes and nodded vigorously.

Puck raised his brows. "Well, I'm a dude. I'm not a chick. Let's go already! Rachel, I'll leave you here!" He warned her.

The rest of the boys wandered over, wondering why it was taking the girls (and Kurt) so long to get up. They'd already voted Puck would be the one to get the girls to stop talking and come on already, but so far, he was in a losing battle against the higher powers.

"Hey girls, what's taking so long?" Matt, Mercedes' new boyfriend, asked. Mercedes had bumped into Matt as she had been in a rush for a new sale. She ended up skipping the sale -he was that cute- and went out to lunch with him instead.

"Incompetent men," Rachel answered swiftly.

"Hey, my junk is all good!" Puck protested.

Rachel put her face in her hands which caused Puck to grimace and walk over. Putting an arm around her shoulder, he tried to get her to look at him. Puck had needed a shoulder to cry on when Beth left and while Quinn found Finn, he found Rachel. They still hadn't started anything, but the other glee members were putting bets on how long it'd take.

Mercedes looked to her man with a raised brow. "She's right. We are better than men."

"Truly," Kurt nodded.

Blaine walked over. "Uh oh."

"Seriously? What are you talking about?" Finn asked, raising his brows.

Jesse, Santana's new boyfriend, gaped. Jesse was still given the cold shoulder by many of the group, (i. e. Puck and Finn) but Rachel had forgiven him for the time being.

Apparently, the whole spy thing? A major turn on. Santana and he hit it off and he took a year off of time for college to stay with Santana and get some cash spared up. He'd shown up earlier to watch glee practice and to pick her up. "You're talking about Madonna, aren't you?"

"I really don't want to have to sing, 'What it's like', again," Artie complained, rolling over.

Will Shuester, the amused teacher who had been listening to the entire conversation, laughed. "You won't. Please girls, tell us what you're talking about."

The girls, all making mental notes to ask about the 'What it's Like' comment later, continued on with their conversation.

"Women, of course," Quinn smirked. "We rule all."

The others, even Rachel, who still had her head in her hands, nodded along.

"Excuse me?" Finn asked. "How do you guys 'rule all'?" Finn asked.

"Yeah, what's so great about being a chick?" Puck asked from Rachel's side.

She looked up and raised her brows. She clearly didn't have any tears on her face. "Are you kidding?"

"No," Blaine shook his head. "I'm all for women power, but you can't just _say_ they're better."

"Yeah, being a guy is way better," Matt nodded.

"How?" Tina asked.

"Yeah, you guys have nothing compared to women," Santana nodded.

Mike and Matt both spoke up at once. "We can pee in the woods." It was strange. They were almost telepathic, the way they spoke sometimes.

This comment brought everyone to a silence. The guys all burst out laughing while the girls looked appalled and disgusted.

Mr. Shue walked over. "Well, ladies, since I can't think of any songs for this subject at the moment, why don't you all just tell us what you think is so great about women."

"We got off the titanic first," a small, quiet voice said at the door. It was Mrs. Shuester. Her eyes were wide, like always and her hair seemed to be extremely straight. You may think, that's the wrong description! Nope, meet former Ms. Pillsbury, and the new Mrs. Shuester.

Brittany sat up. "Mrs. Shue, you could _so _help us prove that girls are better than boys."

"True, she is a woman," Tina nodded, wisely.

Emma smiled. "I'm sorry girls, but I can't help. I don't think any gender is more..."

"Awesome?" Puck suggested.

Emma nodded slowly. "Yes, awesome. I don't think any gender is more..awesome than the other."

"Girls, Emma doesn't want to help because she thinks that you guys are wrong," Mr. Shue said. "Women aren't better than men."

"Actually," Emma stepped inside of the room. "I think it's time that men did know what it is that makes them nonequivalent to us."

There was an 'oh' from the students.

"Emma-"

"Let's sit down," Emma gestured to the chairs.

The girls, who had all put their chairs in a circle, spread them out in a line and added another for Emma.

The boys sighed and took a few more chairs to sit across from their respective partners with Puck sitting across from Rachel.

"Ladies, who wants to go first?" Rachel asked, sitting in the middle of their group.

"I will," Kurt volunteered.

Puck rolled his eyes. "She said, ladies."

"One of the reasons I volunteered," Kurt rose a brow. Then he spoke his thoughts. "You can cry without pretending that you have allergies or there is something in your contact."

"Guys can cry," Jesse pointed out.

"Yeah, they can. I have cried many times," Mr. Shue said.

"When have you cried?" Kurt asked the others.

"I don't cry," came out of several of the boys' mouths.

"Yeah, you do!" The girls all protested.

"Noah, I know for a fact you cry," Rachel stated firmly.

"How?" Puck asked, quickly finishing with, "Not that I do."

* * *

_Puck and Rachel hadn't been hanging out very often, but Rachel had asked Puck's mom for the keys to his truck because her tires were getting rotated. She really needed to attend ballet lessons, but without transportation, she couldn't. His mom gladly gave her the keys. Hell, his mom would give her an engagement ring and marry her, herself, she liked her so much!_

_Rachel got back to the house, a bruise on her head and a few scattered around her body. Puck answered the door and gaped at her state. He pulled her inside and said, "What the hell happened?"_

"_I sort of, got in a wreck," she answered, both hands behind her back._

"_Holy shit! Are you okay?" Puck asked, grabbing her shoulders and looking her over._

"_Yeah, but the car I was driving is not in the condition it was in before I drove it," Rachel muttered. _

"_Who the fuck cares?" Puck exclaimed._

_Rachel took her hands from behind her back to reveal the license plate she'd been holding. DIS6847. It was Puck's license plate. His mouth dropped in shock. He swallowed and cursed. "Shit...I've got something in my contact!"_

"_You don't wear-"_

"_It burns!" Puck hurried to continue, biting his lip and shielding his eye. "I obviously put it in wrong!"_

"_Are you okay?" Rachel asked, knowing he was lying._

_Puck paused and thought about a shit hole he was being. He slowly put his hands down. He brought his arms around Rachel in a hug and said, "Sorry. I'm worried about a contact and you just got in a wreck. Who cares about the damn truck? The damn...dodge truck..." He sniffed. "Who cares? As long as you're okay and still in one piece." _

_He felt like a horrible dude, and he had to stop himself to make sure he didn't reach down to grab his junk to confirm that he was still a _man.

* * *

"Aw!" The girls all cooed at the end of the story.

Puck groaned. "Did you have to tell them the whole story? It could've ended when my contact got messed up!"

All of the guys snickered.

"Mike, why are you laughing?" Brittany asked. "Didn't you cry during Karate Kid?"

Mike stopped laughing and froze at all of the attention now being focused on him. He put a head down. "I was allergic to her cat."

Brittany nodded. "Yeah...he said that so I told the cat to leave and the weird thing is that the only thing he had was watery eyes, no sneezing which is what Santana does when she comes over."

Santana sniffed. "Your cat is a little bastard anyways."

"Language," Emma automatically said. She looked around the room and shook her head. "Never mind." She knew if any club in the whole school cursed the most, it was the glee club. It had cheerleaders, football players, overconfident divas, and the silent minorities so there was bound to be _some _profanity.

"No," Brittany said, as if talking to a small child. "It's a Siamese."

* * *

_Mike sniffed, an arm around Brittany as they lounged on her sofa. _

"_Are you okay?" Brittany asked._

"_Yeah, I think I'm allergic to your cat," Mike hurried to say, wiping his eyes._

"_Cat," Brittany called, looking at the cat, which was clearly not Siamese, curling around the lamp on the side table. "Go away." Surprisingly, the cat jumped down and ran to Brittany's room. "Oh no!" Brittany frowned, getting up._

"_I know... This movie is amazing," Mike nodded. _

_Brittany stood up. "No! He's going to read my diary!" She chased the cat into her room._

* * *

"Ironic that the Asian cries at 'The Karate Kid'?" Jesse asked the room.

"Ironic that I want to punch your face in?" Puck raised a brow to the younger looking version of Mr. Shue.

"I'm Asian," Tina pointed out. "I don't cry at 'The Karate Kid'. He's Other Asian. He's the one who cries."

"I wasn't crying," Mike protested.

"Wait, did you say the cat was going to read your diary?" Blaine asked Brittany.

"Oh yes," Brittany nodded solemnly. "He knows all of my secrets."

Santana frowned. "He knows mine too! So if you'd stop writing them in that thing, maybe it'd help!"

Brittany frowned. "I have to write stuff to remember it," she said.

Mike slid forward and gave her a peck on the lips.

Brittany smiled and then suddenly dropped it. "Don't think that I'm choosing the boys' side now."

"Girl power," Emma said, awkwardly trying to high five Brittany who was at a bit of a height difference just sitting down.

"We've all seen Finn cry," Tina interjected.

"Hey, when did I cry?" Finn asked.

"That time you had a bad day and Rachel tried to help you with a note and you burst into tears," Mercedes explained.

"Oh...yeah," Finn nodded.

* * *

_Finn had, had a horrible day. He'd been late to school, he lost his backpack which had his Spanish assignment in it, which he might fail now. He'd lost a lot of sleep because he'd been texting Quinn, and he couldn't think of a song to do for Glee because he had no idea what the hell a Miley was!_

_It was Glee, then home, and he couldn't have been more happy. He was so stressed. They began to sing and dance to a song by a Miley and Finn's voice cracked on one of the notes._

"_Finn," Rachel said, stopping. "You haven't been working on your range like I instructed you to, have you? What have I been telling you? Dairy is bad for your vocal cords!"_

_Finn looked down, and everyone looked over. "Ow!" He said, not sounding very hurt, so much as confused. "Rachel! Why'd you poke me in the eye? Now my eyes are watering! Thanks a lot!" He ran out._

* * *

"On with the questions," Emma interrupted everyone. "I believe we were going in a different direction."

"True," Quinn nodded. "Who is next?"

"Sports," Rachel said immediately.

"What about them?" Matt asked.

"When boys watch sports it's considered normal, but when girls watch sports we get extra points for being the cool chick," Rachel smiled.

All of the girls nodded.

Puck shook his head. "The last time Mercedes watched sports with me, she punched me in the gut. I think that makes her one of the guys."

The boys nodded.

The girls decided to make no comment on that.

"Oh!" Quinn sat up. "If girls are lousy at sports, then we are fine because we have the excuse of being female. If boys are lousy at sports, then they just suck."

"Then why did Rachel give me all the feminism stuff when I told her she was better than expected at football?"

Rachel opened her mouth to speak, but Puck intercepted the answer. "Because she is Rachel Berry, and she rocks at freaking everything. It sucks sometimes when we're playing video games." He frowned.

Rachel smiled warmly at him, causing Puck to reciprocate the grin.

"Yeah. Thank you for helping the women's side, Puck," Santana smirked.

Brittany frowned. "Which side is he helping? The front or the back?"

"Both," Tina answered, sitting on the other side of Brittany.

"I'll help you with any side you'd like," Puck smirked at Rachel, making sure to give a glance to the other girls. Not that everyone didn't notice the first glance.

"We should write these down," Emma thought aloud, standing up to begin the list on the dry erase board. So far, she'd written down a few things.

**Advantages of Being a Woman**

**-We can cry without pretending to have a contact mishap or allergy problem.**

**-We get extra points for watching sports.**

**-If you're a lousy athlete you don't have to consider your worth as a human being.**

The other girls smiled and nodded.

Rachel thought for a moment and unconsciously slipped off her shoes and put her feet on Puck's lap, as the guys were only a couple of feet away. Puck didn't even think about it when his hands automatically went down to rub her feet.

The rest of the group shot glances at each other.

Brittany decided to speak, not seeming to notice the couple. "When you take off your shoes, no one passes out."

Everyone thought for a moment and nodded, before Finn shook his head. "Not true!"

"Who?" Quinn asked, slightly offended.

"Satan..I mean Santana," Finn rushed to say.

"Dude," Puck sighed, clapping Finn on the shoulder. "You're an idiot. Who punches harder? Satan or the Ice Queen?"

"Satan.." Finn nodded. His eyes widened.

Santana raised a brow, choosing to ignore the nickname for now. "Excuse me?"

"Well...that one time you were really mean to me you shoved your shoe in my face and I sort of blacked out for a second," Finn recalled the moment, frowning. "You have big feet."

"That's what you said to make me put a shoe in your face!" Santana glared at him.

"Her feet are perfectly proportioned to her body!" Jesse protested.

"Shut up St. Douche," Puck snapped.

"Yeah, or we'll ask Satan to punch you," Finn agreed.

"That wasn't even my shoe, Finn!" Santana groaned. "It was yours!"

"You took my shoe?" Finn asked.

Santana nodded and said, "That's another point for the girls. Maybe two since I stole it from your gym locker."

"That brings up another advantage!" Tina grinned. "You could possibly live your whole life without taking a group shower."

"Why would we need group showers?" Matt asked.

"Gym and P.E," Mercedes smirked.

"Girls win again," Kurt smiled.

"You take group showers since you're on the team Kurt," Mike pointed out.

"Yet,_ I_ never lose," Kurt smiled, a seductive glint in his eye.

Puck grimaced, shifting uncomfortably.

"What about height?" Emma asked, a short person herself. "I say, if you're under six foot, you don't have to lie about it!"

The girls all nodded.

"Yes, I don't see what the problem is if you're 5' 11'' boys," Rachel shrugged.

"Rach, you're 5' 3'', of course size doesn't matter to you," Finn said.

Kurt smiled at Puck. "That's the mantra that you'll be needing soon."

Puck and Rachel both opened their mouths to protest when Mercedes interrupted with two words. "Hairy backs!"

"WHAT?" The room turned to Mercedes' most strange interruption.

"I think she means that guys have hairy backs and girls don't," Mr. Shue offered.

"Please," Puck rolled his eyes and gently set Rachel's feet to the ground before standing up and pulling his t-shirt right off. The room raised their brows and he turned around to show them his back. "Nothing." He put his shirt back on and noticed Rachel's eyes a bit glazed over. He internally cheered and smirked as he sat down.

The girls all grinned and looked to the rest of the guys. "Your turns!"

The guys all reluctantly lost their tops and thankfully were pretty much all muscle. It was either from dancing or football.

The girls all nodded appreciatively and then Brittany spoke up. "Mr. Shue, aren't you a guy? Shouldn't you lose your shirt too?"

Rachel was the first one to burst into giggles. Her former crush on the teacher had ceased to exist, no matter what he believed. "Go for it, Mr. Shue!" She cheered and soon the whole line of girls and Kurt was cheering him on. After that the boys joined in, excluding Puck who seemed bitter at the sign of Shue taking his shirt off.

Mr. Shuester laughed and put up his hands to silence everyone. "Alright. If you tell anyone though, I might get in trouble."

Everyone nodded and Puck smirked at the idea.

Mr. Shuester undid his buttoned shirt and quickly took off the t-shirt. In less than five seconds he had his t-shirt back on.

All of the girls cheered for him.

Emma was blushing fiercely.

"I like this test. Maybe we should do another tomorrow, just to make sure no one has any back hair then too," Kurt suggested.

"Getting back to the list of advantages," Santana rolled her eyes. "I say that if there isn't something big enough on girls they can get implants."

Everyone nodded.

"Guys can take pills," Mr. Shue suggested.

"Unless you take them, I'd stay quiet. It sounds like you're giving yourself hope," Tina suggested.

"He doesn't need them," Emma shook her head. Then she froze and blushed redder than a tomato.

The students, shocked, burst out laughing at her announcement to the room.

"Maybe we should move on?" Rachel suggested. Both Mr. and Mrs. Shuester nodded eagerly.

"Alright, I say makeup. If you're not attractive then you could fool people with makeup," Mercedes smiled brightly.

"Yet, you're all very beautiful and you have no need for it," Mr. Shue smiled at the girls, who all 'aw'-ed in appreciation.

The guys stayed quiet. They were a bit pissed that the girls had so many reasons about why they were the better sex. It was completely unfair!

"And our boyfriends have no comments?" Quinn asked.

"You're amazing Quinn," Finn smiled goofily at the blonde who smiled right back.

"No guy could compare to you," Blaine said to Kurt who 'aw'-ed.

"You're sexy. It's impossible to deny," Jesse said, grinning at Santana. Santana grinned.

Matt was next to speak up, "You're unbelievably hot," Matt nodded to Mercedes who grinned and did a secret handshake with Kurt.

Mike smiled at Brittany, knowing just what to say. "You're prettier than a unicorn and a rainbow mixed together."

Brittany jumped into his arms, giving him a big kiss.

Mr. Shuester looked to Mrs. Shuester. "You're beyond attractive." He gave her a kiss on the cheek.

Puck and Rachel looked at each other awkwardly. "Rach, you know your beautiful. If you don't, you should...cause you are."

Rachel blushed, but got up to hug him.

The room sighed at the moment between the two.

As Rachel sat down Tina suggested something. "We can have long hair!"

"Guys can have long hair too!" Blaine protested, gently touching his gelled down poof.

"No, they really can't," Quinn shook her head.

The boys all 'humph'-ed.

The students all flashed back to the 'Hairography' number they'd been forced into.

"Ooh! You'll never have to decide where to hide your nose clippers!" Quinn cheered.

The girls nodded.

"Except that girl on the wrestling team," Santana frowned. "Although I'm not sure if she qualifies in the women category."

The teachers knew it'd be no use to reprimand their students so they kept quiet.

"We don't have to hold our binders in a certain way," Tina offered.

"How exactly do guys have to hold their binders?" Artie asked.

"Well if you're going down the hall," she stood up and grabbed Rachel's binder, "You'll see girls do this." She put the binder in front of her chest and tucked her arms around it. "Guys do this," she put the binder in one hand and held it at her side. "Girls can pull that off too though," Tina smiled and took her seat, handing the binder back to Rachel.

"I do that," Blaine said, putting his own binder in the first position Tina showed the group.

"Yes... So?" Brittany asked.

Blaine stayed quiet and reluctantly put his binder back down.

"I've got one," Kurt volunteered, trying to change the subject. "If you're bald, then everyone will think you're amazing for being so brave as to try and go for a chic look."

The girls smiled and nodded and Puck unconsciously rubbed his head.

"You look fine," Rachel whispered, partially laughing.

"If you have to be home in time for Oprah then you can say it aloud." Emma smiled, drawing the subject away from the two.

"Thank goodness for the power of the record button," Rachel smiled. "I record it so I don't miss any episodes."

The other girls nodded as if this suggestion was genius.

"Who gives a care about Oprah?" Mike asked.

"Your girlfriend. If you were wise, you would too," Brittany said seriously.

The others nodded and the rest of the guys kept their mouths shut.

"Ooh! You can dress yourself!" Santana cheered. "Well...some of us." She sent a snide glance to Rachel.

Rachel looked down and Puck came to her defense. "Hey, at least Rachel doesn't look like a slut."

Rachel looked up quickly.

"Hey!" Mr. Shue said, standing up. "Puck, none of that! Santana, stop insulting Rachel's clothing!"

Santana rolled her eyes while Puck ignored him.

Rachel mouthed a 'Thank you, Noah' to Puck and he smiled a bit.

Tina looked around and suggested, "How about girls don't need to get wasted to share their feelings?"

"That's true," Kurt nodded.

"Except for some of us," Quinn grimaced to herself. Brittany and Santana patted her on the back.

"We don't have to get drunk!" Puck protested. "Watch. St. Douche, I feel that I should share that you're a _complete_ asshole."

"Puck, shut up. You're just mad because I..." Jesse didn't really want to say what he was thinking so he stopped and just sort of nodded.

"Ooh, wait. What about the time Puck and Finn shared their feelings?" Brittany asked.

"They were drunk," Quinn pointed out.

"Really?" Rachel asked, glancing between the two who seemed eager to look in any direction that didn't have each other or one of the girls. "When was this?"

"They were fifteen," Quinn started to explain before Mr. Shue interrupted.

They both shared a glance; Puck looked proud, Finn looked guilty.

"You mind if I tell them?" Quinn asked.

Puck shrugged. "Eh... it's like telling my siblings...except you girls. I don't make out with siblings."

All of the girls thought about it and realized that he'd at least kissed all of them. (Tina on a dare.)

"Alright," Quinn said, hurrying to move on in case Finn's face got any redder. "Well... it was right after Puck first lost his virginity."

The teachers raised their eyebrows.

"Ah," Puck smiled reminiscently. "The tender age of fifteen. College girls are always fun when they're drunk." He smirked.

"Wait!" Mr. Shue held up his hands and everyone looked over. "Puck, Finn. You guys were drinking at fifteen? And sleeping with girls in college? That's illegal. Where in the hell did you even get the alcohol?"

"My mom was going through some tough times," Puck grimaced.

Mr. Shue nodded, and after such a dreary sentence no one decided to comment on the fact that Mr. Shue has said 'a curse word'.

* * *

_Puck had just gotten back from spring break in Miami with his mom and little sister and he'd texted Finn a few hours before he boarded the plane that he had huge news and he needed to be waiting when he got home._

_When he got home it was around midnight, but Finn had convinced his mom that Puck had gotten an early flight and that he'd asked him to spend the night catching up. _

_Finn had invited Quinn, who was also pretty good friends with Puck at the time, seeing as they'd grown up together. _

_Quinn quickly told her parents that Santana was picking her up and she was going to her house. She snuck out through her window and paid her next door neighbor five bucks to knock on the door. When they did she ran outside, calling a quick, 'Bye!' to her parents. _

_When Puck got home he helped his mom unload the suitcases from the car, grabbed a couple of cans of soda from the fridge, and went upstairs. When he opened the door Quinn and Finn were deeply immersed in their conversation, the window open in case they needed to make a quick escape. _

_Puck quickly closed the door and raised a brow at Finn and gestured to Quinn. "What is she doing here, dude?" Puck asked. _

"_Well.. you said to come to your house.. I thought Quinn was invited. Sorry man," Finn shrugged._

_"Besides," Quinn smiled. "It's not like you're getting rid of me now. I need a place to stay tonight. Daddy thinks I'm at Santana's."_

"_Why wouldn't you be at Satan's? You'll end up like her, you spend so much time with her," Puck commented, rolling his eyes._

"_What do you mean by that?" Quinn asked, defensive over the girl who'd moved to Lima less than a month ago._

"_Bitchy and a whore," Puck rolled his eyes. _

"_Guys!" Finn interrupted. "What were you going to tell us?" _

"_Oh!" Puck grinned. Then he stopped and looked down at the sodas in his hand. He passed the two to Quinn and smirked. "We're going to need something a lot stronger than this." _

"_I'm not drinking any alcohol!" Quinn gasped._

"_Chill, angel. Why do you think I handed you the sodas?" Puck raised a brow._

_Quinn nodded._

"_Finn, you in?" Puck smirked._

"_Definitely," Finn nodded._

_Puck told them he'd be back and a few moments later he arrived with a large bottle of tequila and three glasses._

"_I'm not drinking," Quinn reminded him._

"_You might want to," Puck shrugged._

"_So, did you have a nice trip? You seem to have a weird glow about you," Finn said, looking at Puck._

"_You didn't drink before you got here, did you?" Puck said, looking unsure at Finn._

"_Nah," Finn rolled his eyes._

"_Well, I had an awesome time," Puck grinned. "Hey angel," he murmured, using the patronizing nickname on Quinn, "You might want to plug your ears for this one."_

_Quinn rolled her eyes and kept her hands where they laid, folded in her lap._

"_Well," Puck stood up, "Stand up."_

_They both shrugged before standing up._

"_Now, anyone who isn't a virgin, please step forward," Puck smirked and slid forward a couple feet._

"_What?" Finn and Quinn gasped, eyes wide._

_Puck shrugged. "It is what it is."_

_He opened the bottle and poured the drink in all the glasses. He chugged his down easily, Finn as well._

_Quinn, still wide-eyed, reached out, grabbed one of the glasses and copied their motions, coughing and grabbing her throat._

_Finn asked if she was okay, and Puck told her to toughen up._

"_So," Finn said, sitting back down. "What was it like?"_

_"It is what it is," Puck repeated._

_An hour and several shots of tequila later Puck was sitting silently at the end of his bed, Finn beside him._

_Quinn, who had only drunk two of the offered shots, sat on the floor in front of them, patting Puck's knee._

"_It was... It was... different," Puck muttered. "I was bored and I got to thinking about why we were there in the first place, just to see that douche, and..."_

"_And?" Quinn asked comfortingly._

"_And?" Finn asked, patting Puck's shoulder, puppy dog look on his face._

"_And I just sort of wanted to forget," Puck sighed. "I did. I forgot it all."_

_Quinn hugged Puck and dragged him over to his bed so he could lie down. She did the same with Finn and grabbed the pillow and blanket she used every time she went over as her pallet on the couch._

"_Quinn? Finn?" Puck asked, staring at the ceiling._

"_Yeah?" Finn asked, copying his motions._

"_Thanks for listening," Puck said._

"_No problem..." Finn muttered, falling asleep._

_Quinn finished setting up her pallet before she kissed each boy on the cheek and set the alarm. She grabbed the empty tequila bottle and put it in Puck's closet with the glasses to hide them and went to lay down and go to sleep, wondering how this new change in Puck's life would affect him._

* * *

There was no one talking for a moment. "So another point to the girl's then?" Emma asked.

"Definitely," Tina nodded.

"Um...next?" Emma asked.

"Ooh!" Santana smirked. "Using a tanning bed doesn't mean you're a weird loser!"

Brittany nodded and added, "Oh! And if you're dumb people can find it cute. Sorry, Finn."

Finn gaped.

"We'll never have to blow three months salary on anything!" Quinn smiled.

"What would we-" Finn's question was interrupted.

"Kurt call me," Rachel ordered. Kurt did as he was told and "Single Ladies" burst from Rachel's phone.

The guys all 'oh'-ed in unison.

"Another check for the girls!" Mercedes cheered.

"The check!" Rachel grinned. "We pay once in a while and it's okay. Guys have to pay most of the time."

The guys all grunted.

"Let's not bring up the time you told me you'd punch me if I took the check again," Puck muttered.

"That was just for the week," Rachel grinned.

Mr. Shue looked at the clock, noticing it was nearing seven. "We should wrap this up," he said, pointing to his watch.

Everyone nodded and Kurt smiled. "I have the perfect one!"

"Go ahead," Tina smiled.

"A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife," Kurt smirked.

The girls all applauded his genius.

"I think it's safe to say that women truly are the better gender," Quinn smiled.

The girls all stood from their seats as the guys rearranged the chairs back to their original position.

"Thank you, Madonna," Brittany said, sighing.

"Let's get out of here," Mercedes smiled. "We'll discuss what we need in payment tomorrow."

The guys groaned and drove their respective partners home.

* * *

Puck was silent on the way to Rachel's and she finally asked him why.

"No reason," he muttered.

"Is it because of the whole 'better gender' thing?" Rachel asked.

Puck shrugged.

"Noah," Rachel said as he pulled into her drive, "Why are you so upset?"

"I don't know... It kind of makes me seem pathetic," he said quietly, partially hoping she wouldn't hear him.

"What?" Rachel gaped. "You? Pathetic?"

Puck kept silent.

"Noah, all of those things may be true for some guys, but I don't know why you'd feel that way! You're a great guy!" Rachel said, unbuckling her seat belt to give him a hug. "You are very handsome, you're intelligent, you are good for stimulating conversations, and you are _very_ chivalrous. You stuck up for me when Santana made fun of my clothes."

Puck grinned. "I guess so."

"I know so," Rachel smiled, arms still around his neck from the hug.

Puck looked at Rachel. "Thanks Babe."

Rachel rolled her eyes at the pet name and said, "No problem No-"

Before she could continue, however, Puck had leaned and captured her lips into a kiss. Rachel paused before she began to kiss back. After a moment she pulled back, and smiled, getting out of the car.

Puck was very confused and took it as a sign of her running off. He hit his head and began to back out before he saw Rachel waving her hands at him. He parked and rolled down his window as Rachel walked over.

"You know what else is better about girls?" She asked. "We know how to ask for directions. My room? It's this way." She kissed him quickly and gave him a wink before skipping towards her house.

Puck gaped, cut the ignition, and followed her.


End file.
